The Power of Starting: Just Start – Listen – See Where the Conversation Leads You Both…

Here is a note from my friend Randy. It illustrates clearly how important and easy it is to get conversations with our loved ones started. This is the “Now” in Healing Conversations Now. Sometimes I think we believe we need to have all the answers before we begin; this holds us back. Often, simply starting the conversation will lead to unexpected discoveries. Randy’s story is also a good reminder that even when physical health is not the issue, engaging with our loved ones while they are still able to have the conversation is important. Our memories fade, distance separates us, and daily life consumes our focus. It is important to grab the opportunity when we have the chance – even if it’s not as easy as it was for Randy.

Note from Randy:  Tony, I’ve been meaning to read your book; being in healthcare, it does interest me how families communicate, say their goodbyes, and share their stories. I think about my grandmother…she isn’t sick, isn’t dying, and is in decent health at 77 years old. Her short-term memory (current events) is horrible, but her childhood memories are clear and on point.

I wanted to know more about her, our family, where our family comes from, how did we come “to be.” I started the conversation simply by saying, “Gram, how was it growing up?” From there it just took off! She talked about her parents, my great grandparents, and how they both were sent over by their parents from Ireland during the potato famine. My great Grandfather landed in Canada; my great Grandmother landed in NYC. They met while both worked at a hospital.   My grandmother talked about growing up Catholic (very Catholic).  She told me she had two best friends (who were sisters), and they still to this day talk every week. They called themselves the Three Musketeers. She said they would go out every weekend to Orchard Beach to pick up boys. I laughed because she is soooooo Catholic, but “It was to just talk with them,” she said. She pulled out old photo books from when she was a baby, her childhood, her high school days; she showed me her old friends and the boys they used to “pick up,” and how they would choose between them. She liked the James Dean look.   She LOVED to go dancing, and this is how she met my grandfather. They were at a “club” in the Bronx, he was in his Navy uniform. She even saved the admission ticket into the club ($.14 to get in). She wrote, “Ann & Dutchy” on it (Dutchy was my grandfather’s nickname). She saved newspaper clippings, old Yankee tickets, Giants tickets, ice cream shop coupons…she had tons of them, so I asked her, “Gram, what made you keep and collect all these things?” Her response made me tear up. She said, “These are all the things that made me happy. These are my memories.

We really had the greatest childhood growing up.” She meant her generation; they didn’t have a dime to their names, but it was the small things that kept them going, the happy moments that kept their lives in perspective.   Then we got into how it was moving all the time because my grandfather was in the Navy. They lived all up and down the East coast, finally retiring and settling down in Rhode Island. She told me about my dad, and how he was growing up, and my three aunts, and my uncle. I think she enjoyed just reliving her memories. The joy on her face, and the reactions when a memory popped into her head – priceless. We stayed up until about 10:30 pm talking – mostly her talking; I was content just listening.

It makes me want to take a step back and really take in everything that occurs in my life, soak it in, so that I can remember the good times growing up and the good times with my children. I would suggest to anyone, anyone interested in the past and how good it really was, go to a nursing home and just talk with the residents. They LOVE to talk and tell stories about how it used to be.

Comments
48,990 Responses to “The Power of Starting: Just Start – Listen – See Where the Conversation Leads You Both…”
  1. 7 Things About Window Repairman You’ll Kick Yourself For Not Knowing double glazed window Repairs near me

  2. 5 Killer Quora Answers On Replacement Double Glazing Units
    Near Me replacement double glazing units near me

  3. 15 Best American Fridge Freezers Bloggers You Must Follow best american fridge freezer

  4. 10 Beautiful Images Of Bunk Beds Triple Double Single Bunk Bed

  5. bokep viral says:

    What’s up mates, pleasant post and pleasant urging commented at this place,
    I am genuinely enjoying by these.

  6. Double Glazing Near Me Tools To Ease Your Everyday Lifethe Only Double Glazing Near Me Trick That Should Be Used By Everyone
    Know double glazing near me

  7. vimeo.com says:

    One Key Trick Everybody Should Know The One Accident Settlement Trick Every Person Should Know tullahoma Accident
    attorney (vimeo.com)

  8. Medicine information. What side effects?
    duphalac buy
    Everything news about meds. Get information here.

  9. 5 Killer Quora Answers To Sofas In Sale Sofas In sale

  10. My coder is trying to convince me to move to .net from PHP.
    I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on various
    websites for about a year and am worried about switching to another platform.
    I have heard great things about blogengine.net.
    Is there a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it?
    Any kind of help would be really appreciated!

  11. Wonderful post but I was wondering if you could write a litte more on this topic?

    I’d be very thankful if you could elaborate a little bit more.

    Cheers!

  12. Normally I do not learn post on blogs, however I wish to say that this write-up very pressured me to take a look at and do so!
    Your writing style has been surprised me.

    Thanks, quite great post.

  13. Having read this I thought it was extremely enlightening.
    I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this short article together.
    I once again find myself personally spending a lot of
    time both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it
    was still worth it!

  14. It’s an amazing article in support of all the internet viewers; they will take benefit from it I am sure.

  15. casinoz says:

    https://casinoz.nethouse.ru
    Играть и выигрывать в онлайн казино становится все легче! С нашими бездепозитными бонусами и промокодами! Получите доступ к своим любимым казино и выигрывайте с удовольствием!

  16. I was excited to find this page. I need to to thank you for ones time just for this wonderful read!!
    I definitely appreciated every part of it and i also have you saved to fav to look at
    new information in your web site.

  17. Appreciate the recommendation. Will try it
    out.

  18. I really like your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you? Plz respond as I’m looking to construct my own blog and would like to know where u got this from. thanks

  19. Lindsey says:

    Hi there! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow you if that would be okay.
    I’m definitely enjoying your blog and look forward to new posts.

  20. This info is invaluable. Where can I find out more?

  21. SCAM says:

    I am extremely impressed together with your writing skills and also with the layout on your
    blog. Is this a paid subject matter or did you modify it your self?
    Anyway stay up the nice high quality writing, it’s uncommon to look
    a great blog like this one these days..

  22. Thanks in favor of sharing such a fastidious thought, post is
    good, thats why i have read it completely

Leave A Comment